Love me, at least for now
by thatbritishkidd
Summary: I never really liked Adora. Not when she left. Not when she chose her new friends over me. Not when she'd stroke my hair whild I slept, or even now that she's lying with me. I'd call the feeling love if it didn't hurt so much. Catra POV, Catradora, One-shot.


There she was lying peaceably, with her eyes closed and the sun gently creeping upon her skin. She shouldn't look this beautiful. I shouldn't be here, lying right next to her. Because I knew this would be the last time I'd ever feel this _happy_. Yet still, I couldn't dare bring myself to leave Adora. Not while her fingers were intwined in my hair, stroking me gently almost lulling me closer to her. Calling me like the tide to the shore.

It was moments like these that made it so easy to forget the pain that Adora brings. The pain that cuts me in half every time I think of her. Honestly, it hurt knowing that she doesn't think of me in the way I think of her. Or that there are times when she doesn't even think of me at all. Instead she's busy plotting with her new "bestfriend squad" meanwhile I can't get her out of my head. And it kills me, because I've spent countless nights alone, with nothing but a gaping void in my heart. Whereas she'd already replaced me, like a broken toy, and moved on with her new friends. She didn't care that she abandoned me. Abandoned us. So I hated her. I hated her because, she stopped being the Adora I knew - she started being someone else, because she left me alone for them! When they didn't even love the REAL Adora, they only loved that - that facade. I loved Adora from the beginning. Fuck, I still do. It was hard watching my best friend turn into my enemy. But what are we now?

I'm not supposed to be here, lying in a bed with her in Brightmoon, yet I am. I only came to grab the sword. And I could've, but then I saw her the reflection of the moonlight in a trail on her face. She was crying. I thought "what if she was hurting just like me?" Before we were enemies, before all this hurt and pain we were best friends. We were each other's bestfriend.

I pulled her in for a hug. If I held her close enough she wouldn't dare fall into pieces. This wasn't the Adora I knew. The Adora I knew was strong, always up for a challenge, could defeat anything. This Adora felt so fragile. It was scary to see her become this weak. She broke down telling me she couldn't handle all the pressure of being She-Ra, and she couldn't tell her new friends because she didn't want to disappoint them. It seemed like both of us had enough of the stupid game we were playing because she did the unexpected. She asked me to stay with her, if only for the night. And I agreed, kissing her tear stained cheeks. Trying to ease her pain away. Then she turned her face, and brought her lips to mine. That night we crossed a border we were too nervous to cross back at the Horde.

That made me happy. Feeling Adora, knowing that she was with me, that she wanted me even if it was for that brief moment. A moment I knew I would never experience again. When the morning comes we'll go back to being enemies, and she'll never think of this time again. Frustrated I whispered out unknowingly "I just wish you'd love me." Slowly, her eyes fluttered open, you could see she was remembering yesterday's events as she flushed red, soon I feel her lips pressed against mine.

"I do love you." I find it hard to believe because if she did, she wouldn't have left me for them - "you need to leave the Horde so we can be together!"

"I can't leave the Horde."

"Why not? I did it-"

"For fucks sake Adora I'm not you! I'm not some magical eight foot half princess that'll be accepted into Brightmoon will I?" My voice can't keep up with my emotion as it starts failing me and getting softer "It's always been you that everyone wants. Even I want you, but you don't want me."

"I love you Catra."

"But you didn't pick me over the sword did you? You didn't choose to stay with me even after all the times I kept chasing after you?"

"You know I would've but there are innocent lives at stake!"

Of course there are. She'd pick random people who don't give a shit about her over me. It was my turn to cry. "Fuck!" So she pulled me back into an embrace. "Let's just forget all that for now, please. I miss you."

Had it not been for the constant longing I felt the day she left, I would've left, but instead "- I miss you too."

Loving Adora was like a double edged sword. It was so sweet, but it really fucking hurts at times.


End file.
